Giving Yourself Permission to Grieve and Time to Heal
Losing someone is never an easy process. It often feels like the end of a chapter that you might not have been ready to close. Sometimes losing a loved one comes out of nowhere which gives you little or no time to seek necessary closure. While this is an extremely difficult experience to go through, we don’t always give ourselves the care and consideration to grieve properly. Oftentimes people would rather bottle up their emotions in an effort to skip over any feelings of grief or sorrow that they might have. However, avoiding the grieving process delays the healing that the grieving process offers.
It’s important that you experience all the emotions of grief to heal correctly. San Diego funeral homes understand the weight-bearing journey you are going through as you grieve, and we at La Vista Memorial Park and Mortuary would like to aid you with this article, so you might allow yourself permission to heal.
Grieving Is Necessary
Experiencing loss vicariously is a daily practice when one works at San Diego funeral homes as we sensitively work every day to help people in their times of need. We understand when we see those who choose not to show emotion in an effort to appear strong — strength certainly is needed when experiencing loss. We hear those who say emoting is unhelpful to them, as it won’t bring their loved one back. Although you can’t change the past, refusing to express your emotions leads to challenges in your future. Rather, we would like to gently guide you as you necessarily grieve, as we can help you confront your loss head-on. We believe your strength applied towards stoicism is slightly misplaced.
When it comes to healing, experiencing the ranges of emotion in grief simply has no replacement. One cannot heal their emotional trauma without showing emotion, just as one cannot heal a physical wound without physically showing it. Experiencing loss is a natural occurrence in life, and the emotions that come with this experience are normal as well. Allow us to help you normalize these emotions as you grieve, so you might heal easier.
On most days, we all experience small, ordinary obstacles that require small, ordinary problem-solving. Each obstacle makes you feel a particular way. This feeling can be happiness when it’s a good problem to solve, or we can feel neutrality, such as when we tie our shoes. Through our days, we typically have at least some recognition for the emotions which accompany each event we come across, and each small practice of self-awareness helps us continue through our rituals.
Experiencing loss certainly does not qualify as a daily experience, however, the emotions which accompany loss need acknowledgment all the same. Some emotions like anger, rage, or regret can fester into larger health complications if they are swept under the rug into your mind’s unconscious. These emotions left undealt follow people throughout their lives and create seemingly inescapable toxic cycles. Negative emotions can actually cause stress, tension, and other physical ailments in the body as they build to unhealthy levels.
Give yourself the green light to unpack these emotions and allow yourself to feel each one of them without restrictions. Unpacking your emotions liberates you from physical and emotional health problems in your immediate and long-term future.
Taking Care of Yourself
Staff at San Diego funeral homes understand that experiencing loss can send people into a downward spiral of depression and anxiety. This is normal. Most people lose motivation and the ability to handle basic responsibilities. Mundane activities become nearly impossible, and people begin to get behind on life in general.
The problem with this is that when you finally come up to get things on track, you’ll be faced with a mountain of extra tasks. This could cause you to go back into a depressive state. It’s important to take care of yourself as much as possible while you are healing from loss.
Before accidentally beginning a downward spiral, make a special collection of small efforts to improve your emotional and physical health. When you express your emotions with healthy outlets rather than stumbling into bad habits as a consequence of regressing, you will meet your daily challenges with vigor rather than lethargy. While it’s difficult to try something new at a time like this, life doesn’t just stop and wait for anyone.
Attempt to clean up regularly, meditate, and eat healthy meals that create the energy and positive mindset you will need as you grieve. Try new hobbies, pick up a new sport, or create a workout routine. Write in a journal and find creative ways to get the difficult feelings out of your body. Look into painting, dance, music, or other artistic forms of therapy Healthy choices, productive habits, exercise, and creative expression helps you to create more emotionally stable moments needed for leverage against despair. All these ways to take care of yourself are coping strategies to help you get back to living your daily life.
Finding Support Systems
When you’ve lost a loved one, likely you are a part of a community that has lost him or her, too. Trustworthy friends and family members grieving alongside you are the support system you need to heal.
Lean on a shoulder and cry if you need to. Allow people to make safe spaces for you to be vulnerable and receive love and comfort. This can be scary, as vulnerability necessarily opens you to potential hurt feelings. Keep maintaining healthy boundaries, but more critically at this time, don’t push others away in an effort to protect yourself. It’s a challenging balance, but vulnerability is necessary to experience the range of emotions in grief.
Grief therapists offer help to those who seek counseling. San Diego funeral homes offer amazing support for those who come to put their loved ones to rest. They know the importance of providing considerate assistance during these difficult times and make planning funeral services as easy as possible.
Meet your fear of opening up to those around you about how you’re feeling with courage, and tell your loved ones in which way each may help and guide you. In doing so, you may hear from them ways you can help them heal as well. Being a part of your support system means creating opportunities to both help and be helped.
Giving It Time
Each day is unpredictable when you lose a loved one. Also unpredictable is how long the grieving process will take; it’s different for everyone. A common pitfall to maneuver around, however, is to rush one’s grief — which will inevitably extend the difficulties of your journey. Instead, offer yourself enough time to experience each grieving stage as you need. Exhaustion from grief needs to be met with proper rest and relaxation; if you need to clear your mind, take time off work or school. Time is necessary to make the grieving process less burdensome, so long as you put in proper effort towards mindfulness.
San Diego Funeral Homes Can Help
Losing a loved one is always difficult, but you can return to normal life healthy by grieving. It takes mindfulness, habit-creation, your community, time, and added effort away from potentially destructive behaviors. While your situation is difficult, be present through it and permit yourself to grieve. You owe it to yourself to properly heal; you owe it to your wellness, your future, and your surrounding loved ones. Permit yourself to express rather than repress.
We at La Vista Memorial Park, family-owned and operated since 1868, have decades of experience helping our San Diego community in such difficult times. If you’re looking to make arrangements for a loved one and need extra assistance from San Diego funeral homes, contact us today for the care and service you and your family needs.