6 Ways You Know it’s Time to Talk About Cemeteries for a Loved One

6 Ways You Know it’s Time to Talk About the Choice of a Cemetery

As our loved one’s health starts to deline, here are 6 ways you know it’s time to start the discussion on the choices of cemetery to lay someone at rest in.

It can be difficult to open up a discussion around planning for a loved one’s end-of-life situation. 

Whether the person in our life is elderly or young but in poor health, arrangements will eventually have to be made, and it’s best if they’re in on the conversation. While they won’t be able to see the end results (or perhaps they will, depending on what the afterlife looks like) they deserve to make some of these decisions on their own while they’re able. 

There are plenty of decisions to be made and choosing the right cemetery for your loved one to be laid to rest in is one of them. How do you know if or when this is a discussion that needs to be had? 

Keep reading to learn about ways to know when this conversation should happen. 

1. Your Loved One Is Getting Older

The sands of time don’t slow for anyone, and until medical science advances us to a point of literal arrested development, we are going to age and eventually pass away when our time is up. 

For many people, this is terrifying. For those already in the twilight of their lives, though, it may be something that’s already been accepted. You can’t let your fear of death and aging stand in the way of giving your loved one the end-of-life services and choices that they deserve.

When your loved one is getting older and slowing down, consider talking about arrangements for after their death. Remember, being “old” in your eyes doesn’t mean that they’re at all near death, but having these conversations early is far better than having them too late. 

2. Your Loved One is Experiencing Health Decline

Not everyone who passes away is elderly. If you have a loved one who is terminally ill, or who has quickly declining health, it might be in the best interest of everyone involved to discuss end-of-life plans.

This can be a touchy conversation. Younger people especially tend to have a fear of death that can be difficult to work through. Shying away from the conversation, though, means that progress can not be made. 

Even if a full recovery is made, having this conversation is helpful for making plans. 

3. They’ve Become More Invested In Faith

One thing that’s important to many people as they’re considering end-of-life plans is whether or not their beliefs are going to be respected.

Some people have specific plans for where and how they’re going to be buried depending on their religion. If they’ve started bringing these issues up, even in jest, this might be the time to have a serious discussion about how they feel about the local cemeteries. 

4. They Bring the Issue up Themselves

This is the easiest answer.

If our loved one has brought the idea up to you, you don’t have to do any guesswork. This may mean that you haven’t prepared yourself for the conversation. That’s okay because they have.

If they bring it up themself, they’re going to make the planning process a lot easier. They’re doing something responsible and making their final resting choices more autonomously. 

Just because a loved one is bringing up the topic of their final resting place doesn’t mean that they feel as though they’re dying. They’re simply planning ahead. Don’t let this be an alarming conversation. Let it be a helpful and honest one.

5. They Point Out Resting Places That They Like

If you’re driving around or taking a walk and your loved one points out a cemetery or churchyard where they’d like to visit, even just for a walk around, this might be a good opportunity to talk to them about where they would like to be put to rest. 

Do they like the cemetery that you’re in, or do they like a certain aspect of it? Is there a specific kind of headstone that caught their interest? Maybe they have a plan for what kind of cemetery that they’d like to be buried on. Maybe they want a mausoleum or an intricate statue, or perhaps just a tree. 

A walk through a cemetery is a peaceful time to have this conversation, though for those who are uncomfortable with the concept of death it may seem morbid. Don’t shy away from the conversations that you and your loved one need to have because of your own fear. 

6. They Ask About a Family or Couple’s Plot

When people start broaching the idea of a family plot or a marriage plot, they’re also broaching the idea of burial in general.

Not all cemeteries are going to have the availability for group plots like this. This is a good time to start looking at different cemeteries in your area and see what each one has to offer. Setting up a family plot can be an activity that you work on together.

If the other half of the couple or another member of the family is already buried, this is still true. Look into the cemetery that they occupy and see what’s going to be available for your loved one. 

Even if these things aren’t available, this opens up a greater discussion and shows that the family member is ready to have this discussion. 

Choosing a Cemetary Can Be Hard

Many people are afraid of death. This fear can be paralyzing and it can stop you from having the important conversations that need to be had before your loved ones pass away.

Knowing the right time to talk about these things might help make starting the conversations easier. You don’t want to do this alone after a loved one’s death, so it’s in your best interest to get this conversation started sooner rather than later.

If you’re interested in looking into a San Diego cemetery for your loved one, visit our site for more information on your options.